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托福综合写作范文欣赏分析

学习经验 托福

2019年04月05日 14:51:07
今天小编为大家准备了托福写作范文赏析,希望能够对托福备考的小伙伴有所帮助,接下来跟小编一起来看看吧。
ReadingEvery year, forest fires and severe storms cause a great deal of damage to forests in the northwestern United States. One way of dealing with the aftermath of these disasters is called salvage logging, which is the practice of removing dead trees from affected areas and using the wood for lumber, plywood, and other wood products. There are several reasons why salvage logging is beneficial both to a damaged forest and to the economy.
First, after a devastating fire, forests are choked with dead trees. If the trees are not removed, they will take years to decompose; in the meantime, no new trees can grow in the cramped spaces. Salvage logging, however, removes the remains of dead trees and makes room for fresh growth immediately, which is likely to help forest areas recover from the disaster.
Also, dead trees do more than just take up space. Decaying wood is a highly suitable habitat for insects such as the spruce bark beetle, which in large numbers can damage live, healthy spruce trees. So by removing rotting wood, salvage logging helps minimize the dangers of insect infestation, thus contributing to the health of the forest.
Third and last, salvage logging has economic benefits. Many industries depend upon the forests for their production, and because of this a fire can have a very harmful effect on the economy. Often,however, the trees that have been damaged by natural disasters still can provide much wood that is usable by industries. Furthermore, salvage logging requires more workers than traditional logging operations do, and so it helps create additional jobs for local residents.
ListeningProfessor:
Salvage logging may appear to be an effective way of helping forests recover after a destructive fire or storm, but it can actually result in serious longer‐term environmental damage Its economic benefitsare also questionable.
First, cleaning up a forest after a fire or storm does not necessarily create the right conditions for tree growth. In fact, the natural process of wood decomposition enriches the soil and makes it more suitable for future generations of tree. The rapid removal of dead trees can result in soil that lacks the nutrients necessary for growth.
Second, it's true that rotting wood can increase insect populations, but is this really bad for the forest? In fact, spruce bark beetles have lived in Alaskan forest for nearly a hundred years without causing major damage. And of course dead trees do not provide habitats only for harmful insects. They are also used by birds and other insects that are important contributors to the long‐term health of forests. In the long run, therefore, salvage logging may end up‐doing more harm to forests than harmful insects do.
And third, the economic benefits of salvage logging are small and do not last very long, in severely damaged forests, much of the lumber can be recovered only by using helicopters and other vehicles that are expensive to use and maintain. Furthermore, jobs created by salvage logging are only temporary and are often filled by outsiders with more experience or training than local residents have.
一、阅读听力要点概括Reading Passage
Main points: Salvage logging is beneficial for several reasons.
Sub point 1: Remove dead trees and allow new trees to grow.
Sub point 2: Dead trees allow insects to grow.
Sub point 3: Dead tree can be used in industries and good for economic.
Lecture
Attitude: It can result in environmental damage and questionable economic benefits.
Sub Point 1: Clean up a forest is no good for tree growth. (Decomposition enrich soil.)
Sub Point 2: Insect is not really bad for forest. (Beetles lived without major damage, can be used by birds.)
Sub Point 3: Expensive to remove dead trees. (Jobs are temporary.)
二、范文逐段赏析Paragraph 1
The lecturer and the reading passage hold completely different views toward the practice of salvage logging, which is the removal of dead trees from a forest after a fire or storm.
此段功能:
(Listening passage 后文提到用 L 代替)
(Reading passage 后文用 R 代替)
以 L 的观点为主要观点,指出 L 和 R 对于 salvage logging 意见完全相反,然后补充一句 salvage logging 是说在火灾或者风暴后移除死树。

此段结构:
开头段先直接了表明了逻辑程度为反,然后顺便解释争论的论点。

Paragraph 2
First, the lecturer states that removing dead trees is not good for the health of a forest because it deprives it of nutrients necessary for future tree growth, which dead trees release into the soil as they decompose. In contrast, the reading passage states that removing old trees provides more space in which new generations of fresh trees can grow uninhibited by deadfall.
此段功能:
以 L 的观点为主,L 说移除死树对森林是无益的因为死树腐烂的营养是对未来生长的树非常必
要的。相反的 R 却觉得移除死树能迅速空出地方让新树生长,这样无疑会失败。
此段结构:
此段为总分结构。一句陈述 L 的观点和证据,然后表明相反态度后,又陈述了一遍 R 的观

Paragraph 3
Second, the lecturer argues that some insects and birds that inhabit dead trees are beneficial for tree growth. Some others that are thought to be harmful have shown no evidence of causing significant damage to the forest. By eliminating both harmful and beneficial birds and insects, salvage logging may cause unwanted damage to the forest in the long run. The reading, however, mentions only harmful insects, the spruce bark beetle in particular. It points out that because clearing the forest of dead trees also destroys the habitat of these harmful insects, it ensures the healthy recovery of a forest after fires.

此段功能:
第二个分论点中,作者先引出 L 的结论,适当的居住于死树的昆虫和鸟类是对森林有益的。
一些认为有害的昆虫其实并没造成一些显著的虫害。如果靠移除死树把有益和有害鸟类昆虫
都杀死会造成非预期的长期损失。接着作者开始说 R 只注意到了害虫,认为移除一种特定的
甲虫就能保证森林恢复。
此段结构:
此段为分分结构,作者列出 L 的结论和证据后,只轻易的对比了 R 的结论和证据,但是读者
能感觉到 R 的证据的片面,结论的草率。使 R 在相比之下显得十分幼稚。
Paragraph 4
Finally with regard to economic impact, the lecturer argues against salvage logging because the dead trees can only be salvaged at a very high cost. Additionally, the employment opportunities associated with salvage logging are often temporary and are typically performed by non‐native residents. On the other hand, the reading argues that this practice provides many industries with the wood necessary to sustain production and even offers employment opportunities to local people.
此段功能:
在末尾一点经济影响的争论下。L觉得这种移除死树的策略是需要付出十分高的代价的,而且
所谓的工作机会也只是暂时性的,而且通常靠经验者而不是当地人就能解决的。对比起来,R只说死树给工业提供了原料,并且提供了工作机会。
此段结构:
分分结构,L 还是用证据陈列,直接压倒了 R 陈列的非常不足的证据。
三、范文全篇总评
1、 逻辑结构
全文遵从总分结构,开头段直一句话表明了强烈的反对逻辑和总结了争吵的政策。
随后作者只是详细的罗列了 L 的证据和论点,甚至没有说 R 是错的。但是把 R 的证据和结论
在 L 之后一重复,大家就看出 R 的证据也不完整,结论也很粗率,实在是不堪一击。
2、语言表达
文中并没有使用很多生僻词汇,但是段式十分漂亮,可以借鉴的词句有:
1. The lecturer and the reading passage hold completely different views toward(某政策), which is
the (进一步解释政策).
2. The reading, however, mentions only…(观点和证据)
在一大堆详细的 L 证据下,R 仅罗列了某证据,对比之下清晰的可以看出 R 的不足。

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