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雅思写作之使用错误的例子

学习经验 雅思

2020年03月28日 10:25:53
雅思写作中间段落结构: Topic sentence developing sentences。developing sentences即论证部分,主要的论证办法有举例子,因果推理,做对比等。但在举例子的问题上,误区很多。下面小编为大家详细介绍一下,一起来看一看吧。
误区一: 使用个人例子
1. 市面上很多自称是前考官的人是假的,也可能只是的一个普通工作人员,而并不是掌握核心技术的考官。
2. 大陆的留学考试是先有托福,再有雅思。 在托福写作中个人例子的确是常见的论证方式。 很多的托福老师看到雅思考生的数量逐渐超过托福并拉开差距,就开始转教雅思却还是使用托福写作的方法。雅思写作中强烈不建议使用个人例子
原因只有一个,且简单明了:雅思真正资料(剑桥雅思)上满分范文从不使用个人例子。
因为个人例子没有说服力。 我用马云,俞敏洪等曾经英语老师的例子也不足以说明英语老师就会成为一个成功的企业家。用德国(化学专业毕业)和我们的(化学专业毕业)也不能证明化学专业的学生以后能成为国家领导人。 Bad example: There are many reasons to argue that certain professions are underpaid. For example, my friend is a nurse and he has to work very long hours so I don’t get much time to see him, but when he does have some free time he can’t afford to do very much because of his low wages. Good example: There are many reasons to argue that certain professions are underpaid. For example, nurses are often required to work long hours leaving them little time for socialising, and even during their leisure time they are often limited by low wages. Bad example: A friend of mine has been unable to find work recently as he does not have the right qualifications. Good example: It is common for people to beunable to find work without the right qualifications.
又有一个问题 ! 在任何一个雅思真题的下面都有这样一句话: Give reasons for your answer and includeany relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. 题目不是说了examples from your own knowledge or experience 吗?请注意,自己的知识和经历不等同于个人例子。刚刚给大家看的good example难道不是来自自己的知识和经历吗? 比如吸烟有害健康,容易得呼吸道疾病,这同样是来自于个人的知识和经历。不是说一定要写我一个朋友,怎么吸烟,得了什么病。 题目中的意思其实是说不要去抄 or 背诵别人的 ,写自己的。
误区二: 编造"权威"例子雅思写作中的例子不是必须是真的,所以我们很多同学编造一些比如:社科院研究表明...;哈佛大学研究表明...
这些自己都不会相信的例子,更是骗不过阅卷人。 Badexample: The overuse of technology is also having a significant impact on our ability to socialise in a face-to-face environment. A recent Harvard study indicated that most people now spend less than half the amount of time talking directly to people compared withjust 10 years ago, attributing this change to our focus on mobile devices in public places such as waiting for a bus or even walking along the street. Good example: The overuse of technology is also having a significant impact on our ability to socialise in a face-to-face environment. It is common to see thatmost people now spend muchless time talking directly to people compared withjust 10 years ago, attributing this change to our focus on mobile devices in public places such as waiting for a bus or even walking along the street. 现在问题来了?如果同学在话题上有专业背景,确实能记得一些权威机构的专业研究,那么能用在雅思文章中支持自己的观点吗? 答案是不建议 ,因为雅思写作不是专业性写作,写进去可能会适得其反。

误区三: 过于夸张
有些同学为了体现出问题的严重性,采用夸张的数据和例子,是不可取的。
Bad example: Obesity has become an increasing problem over recent years, largely due to diet. To illustrate, 90% of children drink at least 10 sugary drinks a day , in addition to meals that are often artificially sweetened such as breakfast cereals which have 100 times more sugar than needed. Good example: Obesity has become an increasing problem over recent years, largely due to diet. To illustrate, a large number of children drink multiple sugary drinks a day, in addition to meals that are often artificially sweetened such as breakfast cereals containing excess sugar.

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